[ROVERNET - UK] The Ten Rovermandments

[Kent Kinard]

Hi Gang,
I mentioned the Ten Rovermandments a while back and finally found my 
original copy published in the RSTCA newsletter for February 2000.  Some 
familiarity with the Bible might be useful for comparison purposes:-)  
Herewith, for your enjoyment, a slightly updated version.

1.  Thou shalt honor ALL Rovers (even those with BL, Honda, BMW or Ford 
relatives)

2.  Thou shalt not scrap any Rover or Rover parts (unless they first be 
posted upon the Rovernet or offered upon the altar of Ebay)

3.  Thou shalt always speak gently to thy Rover (lest it overheat, 
refuse to start, develop terminal rust, etc.)

4.  Thou shalt work upon thy Rover at least one day per week for thy 
mental health's sake.  (But other texts read, "Thou shalt refrain from 
working on thy Rover at least one day per week for thy mental health's 
sake.") 

5.  Remember kindly all those who
a)  offer good Rover advise
b)  sell Rover parts at a fair price
c)  save Rovers from destruction,
for these persons are family to you.

6.Thou shalt not allow thine insurance to lapse,
neither upon thyself,
nor upon thy Rover,
nor upon thy passengers,
nor upon any who stray into the path of thy Rover.

7.  Thou shalt not treat thy Rover better than thy spouse,
lest thy spouse leave thee penniless and unable to afford additional 
Rovers or repairs upon thy present Rover.

8.  Thou shalt not steal a Rover (except for an agreed upon price).

9.  Thou shalt not bear false witness concerning the condition of thy 
Rover when offering it for sale,
nor about the number of miles thou travelest upon one gallon of petrol, 
be it US or Imperial,
nor about the velocity which thou wast recently able to attain whilst 
proceeding upon the motorway.

10.  Thou shalt often tell thy Rover owning neighbor that thou dost 
greatly covet his Rover, so that the smile may long remain upon thy 
neighbor's face.

Roveremonstratingly,
Kent K.